I'd just like to share some adjectives and adverbs that applied to me before and after Henry's life on this planet began:
relatively flat (where I wanted to be)
relatively perky (where I wanted to be)
Appropriate Eagles Song Title: Peaceful Easy Feeling
lumpy (where I don't want to be)
floppy (where I don't want to be)
Appropriate Eagles Song Title: Witchy Woman
Most days, (and nights--there are two two o'clocks, by the way--in case you were wondering) he's definitely worth it.
PS Another way not to lose weight is apparently to start jogging several times per week. This only applies if you are a woman. If you are a man and start jogging with your wife, she will still be fat (although you keep reassuring her she is beautiful), and your trousers will be much more comfortable than they have been for some time.