I just want you to know that when you put that chair in front of the lazy susan I was not pleased. NOT PLEASED AT ALL. I feel it my duty as your beloved only son to empty all household compartments. I need to explore the contents and broaden my mechanical horizons.
When I place all of these things on the floor I am creating a healthy environment by allowing all family members to exercise their immune systems when they use these kitchen items for cooking, eating and drinking. So any rinsing on your part would be counterproductive.
I am also resentful that all of the small appliances have been cruelly locked inside another cabinet. As my father's son I feel confident that if I disassemble them I will be able to reassemble them. I really don't know why you feel compelled to separate me from my tinkering destiny.
Do not hold my food dropping against me. I drop food intentionally to help you strengthen your lower back. I care about your lumbarical health, mother.
If at any time you feel uneasy, please act frustrated. I will immediately snuggle, thus simultaneously demonstrating and making you forget my devious wiles.