08 April 2010

Rowena's Theory of Darwinian Big Hair

I recently theorized as to the origin of the high density of big hair in Utah. First let me say, that I like having big hair as much as many other women in my great state. There is nothing like having big hair that makes me feel like my face looks petite and delicate, even though most hats are too small for my big head.

Back to the big hair theory. In the olden days, it was very cold (kind of like now, except without natural gas pumped to most homes, that they might be heated to 73 even in the winter). People who wanted to come to Utah often had to experience more cold than many contemporaries by camping somewhere with thin walls, such as a tent, waiting for the spring to come, that they might travel the arduous trail west. Other people decided to come even though it was cold. Many died of exposure.*

I propose that those who had thinner hair were more likely to die of this exposure than those who had thick (conducive to volume) hair. If they died, that means they were less likely to pass the thin hair genes on to the next generation. Hence, those Utahns whose ancestors crossed the plains are more genetically disposed to big hair.

*By no means do I mean any disrespect to the pioneers and all of their faith by this post.

7 comments:

Jesse said...

sounds accurate to me :)

msjvd said...

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LOL! Hahaaaahhaaaa!!

Buwhaaaahaaaahaaa!

Haaahhaaah!!! Hahahahahahahaha!!

The Rookie said...

This explains EVERYTHING.

Project Maniac said...

I've always wondered why my hair was so thick. Thanks for the information. Except I have no volume. Thick and straighter than an arrow is my hair.

Veiltender said...

(This is Thora, not her husband.)

I'd love this theory to be true, because then I'd have lovely, thick hair. Unfortunately, my mother's direct Pioneerness also gave me my thin, thin hair. Maybe my pioneers walked west in the Summertimes.

Pots and Pins said...

Good one...I have my own theory of big hair...either Utah big hair or Texas big hair, which we all know is bigger. The more DEPRESSED a woman is the higher her hair. It's not a theory I've ever tested but when in the land of "perfect people," it would be easy to see why some are depressed...not enough money for breast implants, not the right amount of kids, husband doesn't have the "right" calling...you get my drift...I'm just saying, depression could be a reason...or not. And thanks for the quilting tips - I will now save my dull blades!

Tigger said...

You are silly! Thanks for the laugh!