23 August 2012

On Passive Resistance

Have you ever had something you knew you needed to do, because it was the Right Thing, but you just didn't want to do it because you wanted to exercise your free will to say NO! I am currently in that unpleasant place between acquiescence and outright rebellion.

Even though doing the Right Thing would make sense, and make many people happy, I still just want to dig in my heels, then stomp, and say, like a little child, no, no, No, NO!

One of my baby sisters does this, too. Can I call her baby sister if she is pregnant with her own? Is she still a baby sister? Anyway, she used to say no to things our parents asked her to do, and then she would do them anyway. She exercised her right to resist passively. Then she still did the right thing.

Sometimes I am just sick of passive resistance. I want to become Actively Resistant. I want to go to rallies. I want to speak at them, and to wave flags, and to be caught up in a Cause that is more than just mundane old Motherhood. I want to be one of those badly behaved women who make history.

The irritating thing is that my children are young Now. And Later, the opportunity to give in to some drudgery in exchange for the little golden moments of Mommy Magic will be gone. The laundry, the dishes, the floors, I do not love. I delay them. I passively resist them. But the cuddles, the story reading, the swinging, the funny little sayings — those I find it impossible to resist. I guess I am glad about them.  I guess I treasure them even though I sometimes want to dismiss them so I can pursue something Bigger.

But just wait. When all the children are in school, I am going to go get that Masters in Dietetic Science, and I am going to agitate my way into a Healthier America! Or at least Southern Utah. Or something. 

This is my 700th post on this blog. Please feel free to send gifts and other kindnesses in celebration. 


The Stratton's said...

Reading this made me picture the part in Miss Congeniality when the photos of the super sweet Miss Rhode Island (is that where she was from???) at the protest/riot were shown. To me, that would be you. Proper and kind Jenny in the middle of an angry mob... I can see it :)

sammygrace said...

I like passive resistance. It makes me feel in control, while also out of control (obedient...in relation to our mother) at the same time cuz I still do it anyway :) hahaha. seriously though- i catch your drift. And I do think you will get your degree and make the world healthier. I want to help all the children and teenagers in the world whose mothers, unlike you, don't treasure up the precious moments to read, and play one on one with their children and truly enjoy their company. Your kids I won't have to worry about cuz you're an amazing mom. But that's where my passion lies, and I believe I'll do some world changing too- but it's all in good time. The Lord guides us and gives us opportunities on His timetable. But--while we attempt to be patient He also teaches us more, so we just gotta keep listening to what He has to teach us before we can prove to the world our genius. I have a question about milk for you. I'm going to text you right now.

The Yoder's Four said...

I am familiar with the Independent Woman vs. Goody Two-Shoes inner struggle. Especially as a mom who always has to put others first, it's hard!

Congrats on your 700th post! I'm on 636!

Marie Says Yes said...

Hurrah for the world that we have had your blog for 700 posts!

I think you are tough, Jenny. Of all the things that I like about you, that might be the biggest. You make a difference. And you will whenever you get the opportunity to do it. If it's later or if it's now.

I think that's pretty big.