07 December 2014

Merry Christmas 2014


Dear Friends and Family,

We hope that 2014 (pronounced twenty-fourteen) was as good to you as it was to us. This year, Alex's attempts at Christmas lights resulted in a masterfully crafted cartographic masterpiece. . . made with masterfulness. Visitors who come to enjoy the amazing light displays next door and down the street from our house have been very grateful for the solitary lighted arrow that we provided to help guide them westward and keep them on the road.

This year, Jenny had an entire human being pass through her digestive system. . . well. . . next to it, anyway. Jenny's garden produced a very large pumpkin weighing more than all of our kids, and only took a few months to do it. The garden had no epidural, no pitocin, no whining, no midnight snacks, no strange cravings, no swearing at its husband, no labor. Nothing! Plus, it was almost free. Take an example from that garden, ladies! Jenny also completed a drawing class at the University, and finished eight quilts! Eight! Take that Pinterest! Jenny For The WIN! Jenny also was forced out of her usual gig writing the Christmas letter. Hopefully, that's apparent at this point.

Alex discovered a secret love for Chinese trampoline fighting, and has joined an underground circuit that flourishes in the seedy underbelly of Toquerville. You should SEE the costumes! On a side note, his injuries require major donations from everyone he loves via kickstarter. We are not making this up. (Jenny's note: Alex is completely making this up.) Think Lucha Libre with less gravity, less fabric, and more MSG. Alex continues to teach Photography at DSU during the day, which means that somewhere out there, there could be young people with bits of his philosophy attached. Yeesh. Alex is building another R2-D2, because STAR WARS, and he finally got his shop organized over spring break. . . which took three solid days.

Grace is still learning Spanish. Also, she decorated her own room, which greatly complicated our ability to comply with local zoning laws, and required several conditional use permits before it was legal to enter without proper safety gear. Grace has an odd obsession with Jean Claude Van Damme, which makes us wonder what exactly the school is showing for those perfect reader movie nights.

Henry also began learning Spanish this year, and he found pokemon', digimon', and reggae mon! We discovered that all of our children somehow voted in Chicago in 2012, and Henry was apparently elected to some smallish post in Thailand.

Scott hasn't had a date since he was two, so he's been pining away a little for the ladies, but luckily has set his sights on stealing Jenny away from Alex. He's so much happier when he has a goal. Sometimes, we wake up to find him just standing on Daddy's side of the bed, staring, and muttering to himself. So cute.

“Little” Kaleb (I use the quotes, because he is not, in fact, little) was born on Star Wars day at 9 lbs 10 oz, but hasn't shown much ambition since. He's attempted to ingest bits of the Christmas tree but he can't be bothered to get off his rear end and work for what he wants yet. He never talks to the other kids, just sucks on their faces when they pass within his little orbit. He'll sometimes make rude noises and then just smile. We'll start working on social skills soon.

We hope the coming year brings as much joy as any year may in which a Star Wars film is released.
 
Love to you all, from the Chamberlains

PS Jenny promises to write or edit more heavy handedly next year. 
 






2 comments:

The Yoder's Five said...

LOL!!

Matt said...

Dear Alex,
Please consider this a formal "talking to" about being serious in letters at Christmas. Now, also consider that this letter was in fact way better than all other Christmas writings minus Charles Dicksons and some man named Luke. That is all. Merry Christmas to you and yours. Hi Jenny.

Matt